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George W. Bush
 
"I really appreciate the hardworking staff—the docs, the nurses, the people who make this fantastic facility operate in a way that makes me pride, and in a way that will make every American proud when they learn your story. "—Bush, speaking in Washington, D.C., Dec. 18, 2003
 
 

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"When you sit with a nice girl for two hours you think it's only a minute. But when you sit on a hot stove for a minute you think it's two hours. That's relativity."
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#163 The first penny had the motto "Mind your own business".
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
is so bald that she took a shower and got brain-washed.
 
 

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Q: How can you tell when a man is well hung?
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34,519 articles November 22, 2009 558,335 postings




for 12/1998
sorted by Date

Clinton Wax Off
There has been some recent concern at the famous Madame Tussaud's Wax Museum in Sydney, Australia. It seems that one of their newer exhibits is being consistently tampered with...
Published : 12.28.1998

Rate: 3.21
Guilty as charged!
This must have been the first version of the lie detector.
Published : 12.25.1998

Rate: 2.81
Let's Play with the Polar Bear
At the Anchorage Zoo, an Australian tourist decided she wanted to get a picture taken of her right next to the cage of the Polar Bear, Binky...
Published : 12.23.1998

Rate: 2.99
Handyman Cashes in on 8-year-old's Driving Skills
A repairman is suing Dallas Cowboys star Deion Sanders, claiming he was permanently disabled when his 8-year-old daughter ran into him with a golf cart...
Published : 12.23.1998

Rate: 2.98
Won't You Shoot My Wife Tonight?
An elementary school teacher gave children his version of the lyrics to a popular Christmas song in which Santa asks a gunman to shoot his wife...
Published : 12.22.1998

Rate: 3.03
Guys Taking the Hell Express
These guys don't want to wait on any lines to get into hell...
Published : 12.21.1998

Rate: 2.95
Your Tax Dollars Getting Worked
The Internal Revenue Service has been recently audited...
Published : 12.21.1998

Rate: 2.94
You Ought To Be In Pictures
More than 50 people responded to an invitation to a casting call for a Robert DeNiro movie being shot in Boston. The only problem was...
Published : 12.18.1998

Rate: 3.10
Jealous Man Sees Red
A jealous man ended up quite literally seeing red after attempting to exact revenge on an ex-girlfriend...
Published : 12.18.1998

Rate: 2.94
Flabberlanch Kills Man
A 48-year-old Bridgeport man died Wednesday after his 500-pound wife fell on top of him during a domestic squabble, police said, but they were still trying to determine the exact cause of death yesterday...
Published : 12.17.1998

Rate: 2.99
Burlington Recalls Dog Fur Coats
Burlington Coat Factory, the nation's largest coat retailer, pulled hundreds of men's parkas from its stores after a vendor admitted they were trimmed with fur from slaughtered dogs...
Published : 12.16.1998

Rate: 3.04
Golfer or Smuggler
A tourist, supposedly on a golf holiday, stood in line at the customs counter...
Published : 12.16.1998

Rate: 2.98
Advice From the Judge
What is the modern world coming to when a gang of thieves arrive at the place they are going to rob in a taxi...
Published : 12.16.1998

Rate: 2.99
He Showed Her
A 32-year old man was apparently being disorderly in a St. Louis market...
Published : 12.15.1998

Rate: 3.03
More Genius ATM Thefts
Two Kentucky men tried to pull the front off a cash machine by running a chain from the machine to the bumper of their pickup truck...
Published : 12.15.1998

Rate: 3.07
A New Meaning For Hot Wheels
Crime obsessed South Africans have a new and potent weapon to deter potential criminals - the in-car flame thrower...
Published : 12.14.1998

Rate: 3.02
Excuses, Excuses
Raymond McArthur-Jones, 34, has been sentenced to 23 months in prison for distributing child pornography...
Published : 12.13.1998

Rate: 2.99
What A Drag
Robbers crashed a truck through the wall of a closed supermarket in Peruwelz, Belgium, and dragged the store's safe away....
Published : 12.13.1998

Rate: 2.98
Bongwater Blues
A 45 year-old woman was arrested in San Antonio, Texas, after a mechanic reported to police that 18 packages of marijuana were packed in the engine compartment of the car...
Published : 12.11.1998

Rate: 2.99
A Bad Way to Start Your Day
A 47-year old man, accidentally shot himself to death when, awakening to the sound of a ringing telephone...
Published : 12.11.1998

Rate: 2.97
Drive-Thru Education
Diana LaPorta, running for a seat on the Volusia County School Board, insists she has the proper credentials although a local newspaper has revealed...
Published : 12.11.1998

Rate: 3.02
Milk Maid on the Loose
Apparently a woman in Eureka, CA has been breast-feeding the local children...
Published : 12.10.1998

Rate: 3.03
Flashes of Brilliance
A Dallas man who was exposing himself to passing traffic died Friday night....
Published : 12.10.1998

Rate: 3.02
Frustrated Peacenik Arrested in Attack on Highway
A driver whose license plate reads PEACE 95 pulled up beside a slower-moving pickup truck and repeatedly tried to strike it with a baseball bat...
Published : 12.10.1998

Rate: 3.00
Jolly Ol' Stoned St. Nick
When Mark Calvert isn't greeting shoppers...
Published : 12.09.1998

Rate: 3.00
Bizzare Suicide
The medical examiner viewed the body of Ronald Opus and concluded that he died from a shotgun wound of the head. The decedent had jumped from the top of a ten-story building intending to commit suicide...
Published : 12.09.1998

Rate: 3.29
Sausage Cutter gets choice: $43 or a year in Jail
A Nigerian has been convicted for slicing off the penis of a man...
Published : 12.08.1998

Rate: 2.91
Butler in the Buff
Computer Guy Sheds Clothes. A Kansas City computer worker was so bored with his office job...
Published : 12.08.1998

Rate: 3.00
Please Shoot Me
Joseph Doyle Owens could go to prison if he is convicted of having Scott Alan Sheldon shoot him in the shoulder with a shotgun to get attention from police...
Published : 12.07.1998

Rate: 2.99
Condom Reef Discovered
Oceanographic scientists say they have discovered a vast, floating reef of the world's disposed condoms in the middle of the South Pacific...
Published : 12.07.1998

Rate: 3.08

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